Welcome to BP

I Shot My House

Coach's Note:

While working in prison, I always guarded against being too empathetic or sympathetic. Nevertheless, many of the inmates were highly intelligent and remarkably personable. Much of our life circumstances is not dictated by our smarts, personality, good looks or capacity to be friendly. Sometimes, we just can't handle life well and need to be reoriented to spiritual truth. Put in different terms: when God rules our heart, we don't have temper tantrums that create for us home rebuilding projects.

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I have been through the Basic Progress course five times. It is amazing. I may be biased because I know some of Coach Holland's family members in East Texas. In fact, when He had his restaurant, I ate there a couple of times.

I got in trouble with my anger. I lost control and shot up my house when my wife took the children and left me. The cops arrested me, even though it was my home and I was the only one there. Some of us are dumb. I always felt like I could do that if I wanted to.

I was full of pent up anger and resentment, BP calls them "APEs." I wasn't fully honest the first time I went through the course. I was kind afraid of what coach might say. He sounded gruff sometimes, but at other times, he cried with us and we usually had a good laugh two or three times a session. Some of the guys went on to the discussion group, but I stayed in Basic Progress to record the classes for the textbook, I think.

The other times I have been fully honest. I feel like I am able to be content and productive while still incarcerated. Coach said that state time is not wasted unless I waste it. I believe him. I don't have to be free to be happy. Certainly things could be better, but this is what I have. My foolish decisions put me in this situation, and God's power will carry me through it.

One thing that many of the students don't get, is the personal counsel that coach has given me. I think he felt more responsible because of our ties back home, but he has scheduled four or five pastoral visits with me so that we could talk about my children and some other issues that I am trying to surrender to God. I have told coach how much he has helped me.

In my mind, this is the best program, either Substance Abuse or Chaplaincy, that the state has to offer. I can't wait to get out. I want to work for Basic Progress Ministries.