Deference

Luke 6:27 - 31
"But I tell you who hear me:
Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you,
pray for those who mistreat you. If someone strikes you on one cheek, turn to him the other also.
If someone takes your cloak, do not stop him from taking your tunic.
Give to everyone who asks you, and if anyone takes what belongs to you, do not demand it back.
Do to others as you would have them do to you.

Deference is the Christian attitude of offering great respect or high public esteem to those around us. It is not submission to abuse or acquiescence to stupidity, but it is the reasonable demonstration of how each of us would like to be treated. We are the ones that acknowledge the need for God in our lives. In many circumstances, our example of rising above the situation is the best opportunity for the telling of the gospel. In fact, our lives may be the only, if not the initial, opportunity others have to see Christ. It is a dramatic demonstration of God's grace and love in our lives when we walk the streets as healthy, productive, and content individuals where we were formerly the rebellious and defiant prototype that was the good bad example of what not to do and who not to be.

Turning the other cheek is indeed a tall order. Most of us really want to be understood; our dignity and our self-esteem demands respect. That is all well and good, but not retaliating is usually the best response. It is the best way to defiantly oppose injustice and prejudice. Certainly there are times when appropriate legal venues and thoughtful reprisals are the order, but do we really believe that we are God's kids and that He will take care of us?

In competition, business, play and at rest, we will often be confronted with people who dishonor us or treat us less than fairly. It is usually a good rule of thumb to ask, "how important is it really?" This is not to say that we should continue in dysfunctional relationships or in failed business ventures, but we can transition to healthier circumstances and treat others how we would've liked for them to treat us.

Deference not only asks us to respond to everything with good deeds and in good faith, it also asks us to seek out those that may guide us and be followers to those who lead. Allowing others to take responsibility and consequence is a freedom that allows us to focus on matters that are more pertinent to the tasks at hand. We do not have to be in charge. We do not have to avenge. We are called to a higher level of existence that demands of us the responsibility to set our own priorities and make healthy spiritual decisions concerning our own behavior. Deference means that we concern ourselves with what we can and should do, and we let God do His job. After all, it is His world.